Is Jimmy Kebe the greatest man that ever lived?

814 posts
User avatar
Stuka
Hob Nob Regular
Posts: 3480
Joined: 15 Nov 2006 17:09
Location: North London

Is Jimmy Kebe the greatest man that ever lived?

by Stuka » 02 Feb 2011 10:21

It's about time Jimmy Kebe stood among the pantheon of great men. I suggest we commission a statue of him to sit astride the Maiwand Lion in Forbury Gardens.

Only Kebe matches the lion's majestic stance and to have his likeness rendered in cast iron, atop the Maiwand presiding over the town depicting the nobility and power which he inspires among the people of Reading, would be a fitting tribute to this great man.


User avatar
Ferris
Hob Nob Regular
Posts: 1510
Joined: 26 Sep 2008 10:58

Re: Is Jimmy Kebe the greatest man that ever lived?

by Ferris » 02 Feb 2011 10:31

They've already commissioned a statue for the Beast, so this a non-starter I'm afraid.

User avatar
Stuka
Hob Nob Regular
Posts: 3480
Joined: 15 Nov 2006 17:09
Location: North London

Re: Is Jimmy Kebe the greatest man that ever lived?

by Stuka » 02 Feb 2011 10:40

In that case a public mural of Kebe embracing a local woman, along the lines of



such is the affection among townsfolk for Jimmy.

Gordons Cumming
Hob Nob Addict
Posts: 5300
Joined: 15 Apr 2004 10:52
Location: All Good Things Come To An End

Re: Is Jimmy Kebe the greatest man that ever lived?

by Gordons Cumming » 02 Feb 2011 10:43

No, not quite............................

User avatar
brendywendy
Hob Nob Super-Addict
Posts: 12060
Joined: 04 Aug 2006 15:29
Location: coming straight outa crowthorne

Re: Is Jimmy Kebe the greatest man that ever lived?

by brendywendy » 02 Feb 2011 11:16

without doubt the greatest man

possibly the greatest god of all gods too


pea
Hob Nob Regular
Posts: 2261
Joined: 07 Mar 2009 16:16
Location: brighton

Re: Is Jimmy Kebe the greatest man that ever lived?

by pea » 02 Feb 2011 20:02

Kebe is no mere man

User avatar
Super Royals
Member
Posts: 132
Joined: 16 Feb 2010 14:25
Location: shake Djibouti

Re: Is Jimmy Kebe the greatest man that ever lived?

by Super Royals » 02 Feb 2011 20:06

Stuka It's about time Jimmy Kebe stood among the pantheon of great men. I suggest we commission a statue of him to sit astride the Maiwand Lion in Forbury Gardens.

Only Kebe matches the lion's majestic stance and to have his likeness rendered in cast iron, atop the Maiwand presiding over the town depicting the nobility and power which he inspires among the people of Reading, would be a fitting tribute to this great man.


There should be a statue of Kebe behind the west stand - the man is a LEGEND!!! 8)

It Is What It Is
Member
Posts: 294
Joined: 10 Aug 2009 15:14
Location: Oxfordshire, Born in Atlanta.

Re: Is Jimmy Kebe the greatest man that ever lived?

by It Is What It Is » 02 Feb 2011 20:22

Stuka In that case a public mural of Kebe embracing a local woman, along the lines of



such is the affection among townsfolk for Jimmy.



????

User avatar
seahawk10
Hob Nob Regular
Posts: 3823
Joined: 10 Feb 2007 08:01
Location: One kick. A royal kick! There's more in Reading yet!

Re: Is Jimmy Kebe the greatest man that ever lived?

by seahawk10 » 03 Feb 2011 01:42

I have made Jimmy's greatness known to the locals. Look for this project to be completed sometime late next year.



Mr Angry
Hob Nob Addict
Posts: 5965
Joined: 14 Apr 2004 16:05
Location: South Oxfordshire

Re: Is Jimmy Kebe the greatest man that ever lived?

by Mr Angry » 03 Feb 2011 09:32

seahawk10 I have made Jimmy's greatness known to the locals. Look for this project to be completed sometime late next year.



That leak of toxic fumes has altered Whitley somewhat!!

User avatar
brendywendy
Hob Nob Super-Addict
Posts: 12060
Joined: 04 Aug 2006 15:29
Location: coming straight outa crowthorne

Re: Is Jimmy Kebe the greatest man that ever lived?

by brendywendy » 03 Feb 2011 12:06

Edited for grammar,capitalisation, scanning and accuracy:


Jimmy is a collossus who stands astride the world.
His piss is like blessed rain,
his poo, like lumps of brown ambrosia, falling from the heavens.
His lanky legs hold up the sky,
and his handsome visage makes even the most beautiful
of the angels hide their faces in shame.
He is faster than a speeding comet,
as nimble and agile as a ninja master
and laughs in the face of fear and death.
bow down and tremble before him!

Many believe that Kebe did create God himself,
and that God worphips Jimmy from a shrine in heaven.
His farts are the thunder,
the stars and sun and moon are made when light reflects from his perfect teeth.
His spit is the oceans,
the fish procreate in his name,
the birds of the air sing his praise in song, each morning of every day;
the day that jimmy himself commands into being, and signals to end,
with the rising and setting of the sun that he made
by taking a small flame from the fire in his belly.

Give thanks that you share the same air as He,
for truly you are not worthy.
Last edited by brendywendy on 03 Feb 2011 15:37, edited 2 times in total.

User avatar
Stuka
Hob Nob Regular
Posts: 3480
Joined: 15 Nov 2006 17:09
Location: North London

Re: Is Jimmy Kebe the greatest man that ever lived?

by Stuka » 03 Feb 2011 13:08

Beuatiful words there. Inspired tribute.



brendywendy jimmy is a collossus who stands astride the world.
his piss is like blessed rain
and his poo like ambrosia falling from the heavens
his lanky legs hold up the sky,
and his beautiful visage makes even the most beautiful
of the angels hide their faces in shame.
he is faster than a speeding comet
as nimble and agile as a ninja master
and laughs in the face of fear and death.
bow down and tremble before him.

many believe that kebe did create god himself.
and that god worphips him from a shrine in heaven,
his farts are the thunder.
the stars and sun and moon are made when light reflects from his perfect teeth
his spit is the oceans,
the fish procreate in his name.
the birds of the air sing his praise in song each morning;
a morning that jimmy himself commands into being, and signals to end.
with the rising and setting of the sun that he made
from taking a small flame from the fire in his belly

give thanks that you share the same air as him.
for truly you are not worthy.

User avatar
brendywendy
Hob Nob Super-Addict
Posts: 12060
Joined: 04 Aug 2006 15:29
Location: coming straight outa crowthorne

Re: Is Jimmy Kebe the greatest man that ever lived?

by brendywendy » 03 Feb 2011 15:25

so beautiful i feel that they were probabaly implanted in my mind by jimmy himself.

i may well be the first prophet of kebeism


Elm Park Old Boy
Member
Posts: 812
Joined: 05 May 2004 18:51
Location: Lewisham, London

Re: Is Jimmy Kebe the greatest man that ever lived?

by Elm Park Old Boy » 03 Feb 2011 16:38

Hopefully the religion question in this year's census will find that Followers of Kebeism outnumber Jedis. Not before time.

User avatar
brendywendy
Hob Nob Super-Addict
Posts: 12060
Joined: 04 Aug 2006 15:29
Location: coming straight outa crowthorne

Re: Is Jimmy Kebe the greatest man that ever lived?

by brendywendy » 03 Feb 2011 16:42

im off to start a facebook campaign

Hampshire Royal
Hob Nob Regular
Posts: 1188
Joined: 23 Apr 2004 10:56
Location: Geneva

Re: Is Jimmy Kebe the greatest man that ever lived?

by Hampshire Royal » 03 Feb 2011 16:47

brendywendy the fish procreate in his name,


A beautiful piece, made even more beautiful by the profound truths that it contains. None more beautiful than the image conjured up by the above words.

It's long been my belief that fish shout 'Kebe' at the point of orgasm. I know that I do. :oops:

User avatar
brendywendy
Hob Nob Super-Addict
Posts: 12060
Joined: 04 Aug 2006 15:29
Location: coming straight outa crowthorne

Re: Is Jimmy Kebe the greatest man that ever lived?

by brendywendy » 03 Feb 2011 16:50

agreed. the beauty of it, and the obvious truth of the words totally blew my mind.


welcome brother.
a few more an we can start claiming money from the government as a ligitimate minority group.

Hampshire Royal
Hob Nob Regular
Posts: 1188
Joined: 23 Apr 2004 10:56
Location: Geneva

Re: Is Jimmy Kebe the greatest man that ever lived?

by Hampshire Royal » 03 Feb 2011 16:59

We could call it the 'Kebeism Brotherhood'.

As the Muslim branch of the religion are saying in Egypt, strict adherence to the laws of the religion will be introduced, but that it will be voluntary for the people to adhere to it - they could always be beheaded instead.

And Kebe is not to be referred to by name - he will henceforth be known as 'The Profit'.

User avatar
brendywendy
Hob Nob Super-Addict
Posts: 12060
Joined: 04 Aug 2006 15:29
Location: coming straight outa crowthorne

Re: Is Jimmy Kebe the greatest man that ever lived?

by brendywendy » 03 Feb 2011 17:06

NO!

it is an abhorrence if we assign any earthly label to him.
from this day forth he shall be referred to only as !

Hampshire Royal
Hob Nob Regular
Posts: 1188
Joined: 23 Apr 2004 10:56
Location: Geneva

Re: Is Jimmy Kebe the greatest man that ever lived?

by Hampshire Royal » 03 Feb 2011 17:09

I bow to your greater wisdom, O Master!!


(Mind you, wait until he's sold and then see what people call him!!)

814 posts

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 236 guests

It is currently 23 Nov 2024 00:23